Last weekend I was digging up some pictures from a few years back and happened to stumble upon this little toddler that I can barely remember. How can that be? Four years ago.. three years ago... it's not that far back, yet this little baby with those chubby cheeks, pacifier in his mouth, and crazy cute voice seems like a distant memory.
This is the problem with life, you see... or at least with my life. The hours, days, weeks, and years that I spend absorbed adulting at work keep me from being present and having focus and creating concrete memories that keep these baby moments alive in my mind.
Where did this little peanut go?
I don't dwell too much on the sadness of my boys growing up. I happen to enjoy them more and more every year and feel so proud of the young men they are becoming.
But there is something about this little guy... when I see his baby and toddler pictures, my heart sinks down to my toes... and I. just. miss. him.
I have no doubt that a big part of the emotion I feel is guilt... all the days that I've been at work and not at home making him lunch, wiping his tears, kissing his cheeks, and making him laugh. I feel like I'm failing him in some way.
I can only hope that the moments we're together is time well spent and that those memories have an impact and stand out in our minds.
I've also come to learn that many of my memories are shaped through my blog... it's through the reflection of my thoughts of our experiences that ultimately stamp the memory in my mind... the pictures, the words, the stories I tell. And the problem is, I didn't make time for blogging in 2016 and 2017...
So, the pictures of this little baby snuck up on me when I was flipping through old photos...
But what a sweet, sweet surprise it was to find these in there waiting for me.
It would be tragic to completely miss out on all this cuteness ~
A blog post of my sweet toddler, Luke... another memory forever stamped in my mind.
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